Guys

I consider myself to be independent. By no means do I think I''m perfect, but again, I don't think perfection is attainable. I like how I don't care too much, that I don't need so much ego-boosts as the majority of my counterparts, that I like/love talking to extremely different people who ultimately aren't that different. I like the "jocks" vs. my bio nerds... the "shy" girls vs. outgoing easy ones... the "bad" people to the "bad" reputation.

I simply love it, however; today I was watching Glee and I heard the cutest thing I've heard in a long time "There's a moment when you say to yourself, 'Oh, there you are, I've been looking for you for forever'." (it's actually from a guy to another gay guy) adorable regardless... anyways today I was missing the feeling of crushing on someone, liking them, thinking about then, holding their hand.

I'm very proud of never faking feelings when it comes to guys. When guys liked me but I didn't like them, easy... I didn't lead them on... When I like a guy... I will eventually tell him.... If I just want to make it a once type of thing, I'm very open about it... If I think that he's not the brightest I tell them... If they're good-looking... I might tell them .... etc. I vow to never do otherwise. Faking attraction, or feelings to get your way is not only mean but pathetic that you couldn't find any other way to do it. I wanna like a guy but really like him. When he tells me something I want it to mean more to me than anything else anyone says, when he looks in my eyes I want it to be like he sees me, when he holds my hand, it's the simplest cutest thing he could ever do... to hug me.... not for the people at school, not for show, not for his friends or family but for himself, for us...

I just realized I got all... umm... what is that? Romantic?..... Anyways

I miss it